It’s dangerous to be a sorceress in a place where magic is a crime. Good hook! 15-year-old Tatiana (Tana) Definitely pick one name and go with it has never seen the world beyond her village on the island of Kisiwa. Her past is a giant question mark, her parents are lost to her memory, and her only link to them is a strange amulet she’s had since birth. Though Tana longs to run away to the distant mainland, far from her drunken uncle and their decrepit farm, she can't risk losing her only home. But when an assassin murders her uncle, Tana flees the island and finds herself at the center of a crazed sorcerer’s insidious plan. With a bounty on her head, she scrambles to uncover the ugly truth about her amulet and save the only people she trusts.

While this is well-written, you're suffering from the same issue that an earlier Slash had - you're being too vague. You've got a name and an island, but there is nothing else here to differentiate this story from any other number of fantasies that deal with a lost past, a found hero, and a villain. Why is her uncle murdered? What is the ugly truth about the amulet? Why is magic a crime here? A query needs to not be a tease. You're not trying to get an agent to wonder what will happen next - that's for a reader. For an agent, you want to show them why they want to represent this book. In other words, what make this different and unique from every other fantasy query they had in their inbox this week that deal with these same tropes - a lost, special child, a murky past, and a destiny that can't be avoided.

The Lost Heir is book one of a YA fantasy series, complete at 70,000 words. This novel would interest readers who loved J.K. Rowling’s Harry Potter and John Flanagan’s The Ranger’s Apprentice.For comp titles, it's better not to use really big names. Everyone wants to think that they will be the next Harry Potter, so it's overused. I’m 16, and I live in Santa Barbara, CA where I am a student at Laguna Blanca Highschool. For the last five years, I’ve written various versions of this novel, though I’ve never submitted it for publication. I also review YA books for the Santa Barbara Independent; for example, this is my most recent review (https://www.independent.com/2020/07/20/review-hafsah-faizals-we-hunt-the-flame/). Also, I participated in a Stanford Pre-Collegiate creative writing course in the summer of 2019.

It's great that you are serious enough to pursue a pre-collegiate program, but I don't know that I would share your specific age, or student status. I would instead let the work stand for itself, and see if it garners interest. Of course, if they should request to see pages, or a full manuscript, you should be up front about your age. I don't think it can necessarily hurt or help you either way, but I don't know that it merits mention in a query.