So, the German edition of NOT A DROP TO DRINK is titled BIS ZUM LETZTEN TROPFTEN, which translates as "to the last drop." I love that the German publisher kept my original cover, making it a hazy yellow. Like a good author, I've been trying to find ways to promote the German edition online. One of the easiest ways is to write up my bio in German for the German Amazon site.

Easy. Copy / paste my bio into Google Translate and plop it into my German Author Central page, right? Um... no. Luckily for me, my friend Lenore Applehans warned me that translation machines aren't always accurate, and in fact can completely twist your words. With that in mind, I used one to translate my bio into German, then re-translated it back into English using a different site. I did this with a few sites, hoping to get the most accurate rendition possible.

What I got was not exactly helpful, but definitely humorous.

Original Bio:

Mindy McGinnis is an assistant YA librarian who lives in Ohio and cans her own food. She graduated from Otterbein University magna cum laude with a BA in English Literature and Religion. Mindy has a pond in her back yard but has never shot anyone, as her morals tend to cloud her vision.

The Slightly-Less-Official Version, with Better Details:

Mindy grew up in the woods, and had a deep desire to see if she could survive out there on her own if the situation ever presented itself. That never happened, and the introduction of the internet has quelled that urge.

She loves being a writer, because it’s the only occupation where you can legitimately stare into space and claim to be working.

Translation #1:

Mindy McGinnis is an assistant YA librarian who lives in Ohio and own food cans. She graduated from Otterbein University magna cum laude with a BA in English Literature and Religion. Mindy has but a pond in her backyard has never shot anyone, as their morals tend to dull their vision.

The slightly-less-official version, with better details:

Mindy grew up in the woods, and had a deep desire to see if they could 
survive out there on their own, if the situation ever presented. That never happened, and the introduction of the Internet has depressed this urge.

She loves being a writer, because it was the only occupation where you can look right into the room and pretend to work.

Translation #2:

Mindy McGinnis is a wizard YA librarian who lives in Ohio and your own food cans. She graduated from Otterbein University magna cum laude with a BA in English literature and religion. Mindy has a pond in your garden but has never shot, as their morals tend to cloud your vision.

The Slightly-Less -official version, with better information:

Mindy grew up in the woods, and had a deep desire to see if they could survive there are on your own if the situation never presented itself. That never happened, and the introduction of the Internet has tear gas, please.

She loves it, a writer, because it’s the only profession, you can do pretty rigid in space and right to work.