All The Fun Things That Happened When I Left My House

Seriously, what a week.

It's been amazing and awesome and other "a" words, and now I'm exhausted.

I was cold in the mountains, hot in the desert. I slept on floors, couches and airplanes. I got migraines, got rid of migraines, and then had a lingering suspicion that I was about to get a migraine. I flew over the Rockies and asked for silent forgiveness from Lynn & Lucy. I went to the Bellagio and asked for silent forgiveness from the people that run the greenhouse there.

I rode, flew, walked, ran, fell down (I stepped on one of those tubular pillows, long story), and had my first In-N-Out burger. I ate at the Claim Jumper because I thought it said Clam Jumper. I sold books, signed books, and bought books.

Vegas holds just about zero allure for me. It has nothing to do with sin and more about my need for simplicity. Also naked people is just not my venue. Slot machines make me think I'm about to have a seizure, so I held onto pretty much all my money until we went to the Vegas Valley Book Festival and  the organizers offered to ship authors' purchases home since we were traveling.

Now THIS is sin. THIS is temptation. THIS is how you part me from my money.

I flew back to lovely, cold, gray Ohio at midnight, got to bed at 3AM and was at work by 7.

Why? Because I'm a normal person with a normal job who does normal things most of the time.

Except, I was on NPR yesterday. You should listen.

Feeling The Librarian Love

People always ask me how my life has changed since becoming published. And the honest answer is- not a whole lot. I still work the 40/wk, my dog still poops on the floor next to my bed occasionally, and I get flat tires just like everyone else. I've never really felt like things were different... until this past weekend.

I had the opportunity to visit Henderson Library in Jefferson, Ohio on Saturday. I've done a ton of presentations across the state, and I always enjoy meeting fellow librarians as well as talking face to face with fans. Reaching new readers is a plus too, and I'm not lying when I say I don't mind driving three hours to "go do a thing," as the boyfriend calls it.

But what happened in Jefferson this weekend was different. I told the ladies involved in planning the event that I think they put more effort into it than I did into writing the book.

For starters - they made Lynn's basement. Yes, they did. I honestly think Lynn could've walked into
that presentation room and said, "Yeah, I could live here." Why?

1) Her bed was in a strategic position so that she could see both entrances to the room.
2) There was water, canned food, and a lantern within reaching distance.
3) They said they wanted to include a rifle, but decided against it given... you know... the law.

But they didn't stop there-- Stebbs was well represented too. Just to make sure the old guy felt welcome they put red bandanas all over, and even included his ladder (in one piece) so that he could climb up or down to his secret water source whenever he needed.

Granted, Mother might have been a bit nervous when she saw that there were coyotes leaping all over the walls, but there was a border of roof tiles across the top so that she had a semblance of safety. Mother also would have found comfort in the fact that there were raindrops hanging from the ceiling (complete with book covers) and next door there was - get this - a water bar. Yep. Name your poison. Just make sure it's water.

I was so flattered. Just walking into the room was an amazing experience, and then they knocked me flat by sharing a Mindy McGinnis Mix CD. These girls did their research (they are librarians, after all). They found my playlists for both NOT A DROP TO DRINK & IN A HANDFUL OF DUST and played the songs while the audience filtered in.

And that's when things got surreal for this farm girl. Most of the people who came to see me were already fans. I'm not stupid. I know I have fans, but when they are getting so many tickets in advance that we ended up scheduling two presentation times to accommodate them, it kind of blows my mind. And they had questions - real questions that showed they'd read my books, contemplated them, and got them.

My blog even got some love. A college student told me that one of her assignments had been to find a blog and do a paper on it. She found Writer, Writer, Pants On Fire while cruising for an appropriate subject and chose it. This really floored me. Like, Mindy Is On The Ground Now. Most of you are probably aware that blogging takes a lot of time, a lot of dedication, and is completely non-monetary. I don't make a dime off this blog, and there's been more than once that I thought maybe I should hang it up and concentrate on novels. It never fails that when this happens I get an email from an aspiring writer, telling me that they use it as a constant reference from the query trenches, or a fellow writer going through submission hell who says that the SHIT interview is what kept them sucking air while waiting for a reply.

All that being said, I'm still me. I own more Carharrts than purses, and I just spotted a little bit of breakfast on my cheek before I sat down to write this. So, has my life changed since becoming published? No, not really. But after this weekend, I think maybe me being published has affected other people's lives.

And that's way cooler.

Mindy McGinnis, Wizard-Librarian- Now With Tear Gas: Or, Lost in Translation- Why You Should Always Double Check Translation Machines

So, the German edition of NOT A DROP TO DRINK is titled BIS ZUM LETZTEN TROPFTEN, which translates as "to the last drop." I love that the German publisher kept my original cover, making it a hazy yellow. Like a good author, I've been trying to find ways to promote the German edition online. One of the easiest ways is to write up my bio in German for the German Amazon site.

Easy. Copy / paste my bio into Google Translate and plop it into my German Author Central page, right? Um... no. Luckily for me, my friend Lenore Applehans warned me that translation machines aren't always accurate, and in fact can completely twist your words. With that in mind, I used one to translate my bio into German, then re-translated it back into English using a different site. I did this with a few sites, hoping to get the most accurate rendition possible.

What I got was not exactly helpful, but definitely humorous.

Original Bio:

Mindy McGinnis is an assistant YA librarian who lives in Ohio and cans her own food. She graduated from Otterbein University magna cum laude with a BA in English Literature and Religion. Mindy has a pond in her back yard but has never shot anyone, as her morals tend to cloud her vision.

The Slightly-Less-Official Version, with Better Details:

Mindy grew up in the woods, and had a deep desire to see if she could survive out there on her own if the situation ever presented itself. That never happened, and the introduction of the internet has quelled that urge.

She loves being a writer, because it’s the only occupation where you can legitimately stare into space and claim to be working.

Translation #1:

Mindy McGinnis is an assistant YA librarian who lives in Ohio and own food cans. She graduated from Otterbein University magna cum laude with a BA in English Literature and Religion. Mindy has but a pond in her backyard has never shot anyone, as their morals tend to dull their vision.

The slightly-less-official version, with better details:

Mindy grew up in the woods, and had a deep desire to see if they could 
survive out there on their own, if the situation ever presented. That never happened, and the introduction of the Internet has depressed this urge.

She loves being a writer, because it was the only occupation where you can look right into the room and pretend to work.

Translation #2:

Mindy McGinnis is a wizard YA librarian who lives in Ohio and your own food cans. She graduated from Otterbein University magna cum laude with a BA in English literature and religion. Mindy has a pond in your garden but has never shot, as their morals tend to cloud your vision.

The Slightly-Less -official version, with better information:

Mindy grew up in the woods, and had a deep desire to see if they could survive there are on your own if the situation never presented itself. That never happened, and the introduction of the Internet has tear gas, please.

She loves it, a writer, because it’s the only profession, you can do pretty rigid in space and right to work.