The Saturday Slash

Don't be afraid to ask for help with the most critical first step of your writing journey - the query.

I’ve been blogging since 2011 and have critiqued over 200 queries here on the blog using my Hatchet of Death. This is how I edit myself, it is how I edit others. If you think you want to play with me and my hatchet, shoot me an email.

If the Saturday Slash has been helpful to you in the past, or if you’d like for me to take a look at your query please consider making a donation, if you are able.

If you’re ready to take the next step, I also offer editing services.

My thoughts are in blue, words to delete are in red, suggested rephrasing is in orange.

THE GREAT RESIGNATION, a first-person 66,000 word upmarket novel with a passionate adult love story, mixes the humor and vulnerability of Something To Live For by Richard Roper with the voicey style and narrative twists of a Jonathan Tropper novel. I always tell people to start with their hook - everyone has a title, a word count, and comp titles. Start with something no one else has - the hook for your book. Could just be me, but that's where I land.

Presaging today’s headlines, it’s 2009, If it's set in 2009, it can't really presage today's headlines, b/c we already have that knowledge. I realize that's a loose interpretation of the word, but it was my immediate thought upon reading it and Will and Clara quit their respective positions as lawyer and local newscaster to pursue risky dreams. Like what? We need to know what they are in order to believe that they are risky, or understand why this presages anything Spurring each other on, they become deeply involved. With what? Each other? These risky dreams? How do they spur each other on? Will persists down the low-status path of working as a children’s clown and musician, informed by his guilt over acquitting a client who went on to murder her child — an impossible debt to discharge. It's an interesting idea, however, why does he feel like this appraoch cleanses him? Will’s mother, brother, and colleague urge him to bear up and get back to work. His original career? Only Clara stands behind his career change — until she does an abrupt 360 and begs him to try her father’s battery case. What is Clara's arc? What was her risky dream? You already stated earlier that they spur each other on, so we don't need the restatement When Will refuses, Clara leaves him, claiming he is limited in his capacity to give, an assessment Will grudgingly accepts. Even so, he and Clara seem on the verge of reconciliation when she learns of his rebound one-night-stand with Alessia, the daughter of Clara’s ruthless new boss.New boss in what sector? Clara is totally lost in this narrative, even though it began seeming as if it was about both of them Now, without Clara’s support, Will must persevere in his new calling — strictly for himself. But wasn't he doing it for himself to begin with? There was no statemetn that made it seem like Clara is benefiting from his new career When a botched surgery takes Alessia’s life, Will offers his legal services to Clara’s boss to save her grandson from an abusive father. So he'll return to the career he hates for the son of his one night stnd, but not for his girlfriend's father? Why? As Will seeks to win the case, and Clara, he continues to explore whether he must change himself to fit the world. We need to know more about the motivation - why would he quit in the first place? How does he think the new career is going to save his soul, and what's the motivation for returning to it? What has changed that he would even consider it? This also needs to be reframed so that it doesn't open sounding as if it's going to be equally about Will and Clara - it's not.

This story is loosely based on my own journey from lawyer-to-clown-to-kids-musician as featured in my NY Times essay http://ow.ly/fuI030iK7TC which provoked 465 reader comments. From this experience, I learned to use my work not to gain prestige but as a means to craft a joyful life.

When writing transformative fiction, is it more important to keep the main character likable, or interesting?

By Gary Lee Miller

What kind of reader are you? Many readers who enjoy transformative fiction prefer the main character to be “likable” or “feel like a friend.” Other readers are just as happy with a main character who may be an “anti-hero,” or in other words someone not necessarily likable, but interesting, as the main character driving the story forward.

Readers may either identify with or have sympathy towards the main character - or not. Regardless, it is important that on some level the reader is invested in the main character enough to continue reading, waiting to see developments which lead to their transformation or transformations to those around them. That is the challenge of the author.

Authors walk a tightrope when creating their book’s protagonist since that character is typically who drives the plot forward. Often the protagonist’s likeability factor may be influenced by the strength of the antagonist’s un-likeability factor (if there is an antagonist). In other words, “How bad is the bad character?” Most readers enjoy rallying against the bad character, or characters, which creates an even stronger juxtaposition when paired with a very likable or sympathetic protagonist.

The positive transformation is common for many authors and traditionally used in most feel-good novels. Little Women by Louisa May Alcott is an example of a book with multiple protagonists and positive transformations. Having multiple protagonists provides the reader with the opportunity to relate to one or more those characters, making the reading experience more enjoyable. Meg, Jo, Beth, and Amy each have character flaws, making them more human, and interesting to the reader. The readers either see some of themselves in one or more of them or recognize friends or family members who have characteristics similar to one of more of the sisters.

Transformations can also be either positive or negative, depending on what the author wishes to convey to a reader. In a cautionary tale, the author may begin with a likable character and take their reader on a journey of seeing that character disintegrate due to their own poor decisions or external factors not within the character’s control. An excellent example of a negative transformation would be Michael Corleone in Mario Puzo’s The Godfather. Michael starts out as a war hero with a promising future, not being entangled in his family’s organized crime activities. Then circumstances lead Michael to make the pivotal, life-changing decision to avenge his father’s assassination attempt. That decision leads to the long, slow transformation of his character, including the carnage brought to those around him, friends, foes, and family, as he solidifies his power.

It’s not always necessary for an author to have an antagonist. My book, Finding Grace, does not have a traditional antagonist. Instead, the internal conflict comes from within its main character and protagonist, Judith, helping drive the story. This internal conflict results from her very challenging, sometimes traumatic childhood. Now with Judith as an adult, the reader shares in her transformational cross-country bus trip (her grandmother’s dying wish) as she is forced from the protective cocoon her immense wealth has allowed her to create, back into the real world. The reader is drawn in during her six-day journey from LA to Nashville by the backstories of her six different seatmates along with their interaction with Judith. In this case, while each day’s seatmate is facing their own challenges, my goal for the reader was for them to be very interested in her seatmate’s stories while seeing the positive evolution of Judith’s character as she engages in entertaining, thought-provoking conversations with them.

In transformative fiction, the reader should enjoy experiencing the main character’s evolution. But the storyline of the main and various characters should touch the reader at a deeper level, challenging them to understand themselves, causing them to ask questions about their own experiences and beliefs.

The original question was, “When writing transformative fiction, is it more important to keep the main character likable, or interesting.” There is no definitive answer because it all depends on the story and the author’s goal and style of writing. The overriding factor for any author in any genre is that the story must be interesting. Speaking of interesting, I believe you will find interesting what I’m sharing next.

In a conversation with the founder of an international publishing company I asked him, “I know you have your people who read the manuscripts submitted by authors with hopes of publication. Do you ever read any of them?” His reply was what I expected, but with a twist. As expected, he said he did not read the manuscripts, however he shared an exercise I believe every author will benefit from by doing the same. His continued reply was, “While I don’t read them, what I do occasionally with a manuscript is to randomly pick out a page, read it, and ask myself, ‘Does the author have my interest, making me want to read more?’” He said he would read four or five more randomly selected pages throughout the manuscript asking himself the same question. That often determined whether that manuscript was given a green light – or not.

Whether “likability” or “interesting” is more important in transformational fiction is debatable. Great books have a balance of both. If forced to choose between the two, my choice would be with “interesting,” for without an interesting main character, what’s the point of reading the book?

Gary Lee Miller is an award-winning author and actor. His debut novel, Finding Grace is available from booksellers everywhere. More about Gary at garyleemillerbooks.com

Erika Robuck on the Enduring Stories of Women in World War II

Erika Robuck joined me today to talk about her novel Sisters of Night and Fog, how World War 2 continues to be a fertile place for novels, especially as the stories of women resistors and spies become more well known, through the declassification of documents. Also covered - researching for historical novels, and why World War 2 is so horribly relevant today.

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